A Downtown Discovery

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I scored two free tickets to see Big Fish on Thursday night. The catch (pardon the pun)? I wrote a review for a local paper. But I’d like to share a little bit of the experience that isn’t in the review.

Big Fish is playing September 11-October 4th at Red Mountain Theatre on 19th Street. Street parking was easy to get, but there is also a nearby parking garage. The entrance to the venue, in the Kress building, is nothing elaborate. As soon as you go in, you head downstairs. There it’s a different world. The area isn’t large, but the seats are comfortable, the stage and sets were fabulous, and the place serves drinks if you are so inclined.

A word of warning, though. DON”T use the bathrooms upstairs. Before the show, my friend and I needed to go and didn’t see any restrooms downstairs. They were there, just behind the curtain that hadn’t opened yet. So we found the restroom in the hall upstairs. It was like any other restroom in an office building. But, when I came out  of the stall to wash my hands, I was informed by a woman “You know these aren’t public bathrooms. I was wondering who was in here. These are for the lawyers.” I apologized, but I wanted to laugh. Clearly she needs to put a sign on the door that says “Lawyers Only”.  Maybe she should set up her office in there.

The show was fabulous, full of actors with local connections and wonderful voices. It was an evening of entertainment well worth the rebuff of the little lawyer.

The original article is Big Fish – A Big Performance! 

Out of the Mouth of Babes – A Journey

Photo by Tina Phillips. Photo by Tina Philips

This month Alabama Women Bloggers has challenged its members to write about their blogging journeys.

The first blog I ever started had the Out of the Mouth of Babes in my url.  It was a Blogger/Blogspot  blog that now I can’t figure out how to access. I’ve tried all kinds of things to no avail. I hope one day I can figure it out and get my content back. If anyone out there has any helpful hints, please let me know.  Persistence paid off – I’m in!!!

Anyway, I started that blog when I was still teaching fulltime, using funny stuff culled from my students and some of my own poetry and personal essays. Now I’m a substitute teacher and I still find lots of gems in the classroom. I have two current blogs – this one which is B’ham focused, and another, Not In This Soup Alone, which is more personal.

Being in the classroom, especially as a substitute teacher, can be a real source of entertainment. Such as when students have to write sentences using their vocabulary words. In the spring I had fun reading some of the sentences created for the words floundered, laden, and remote. Laugh along with me…

The remote school is in the middle of the road.

I picture a one-room schoolhouse plopped down in the middle of a road in the middle of nowhere.

The woman floundered after getting tazed.

I believe I would flounder a bit if I was tazed, wouldn’t you?

The camel was floundered.

I wonder if the camel was also tazed? I think perhaps he was laden down with something illegal and thus he was tazed and floundered.

This is a laden place.

This was a dark coffeehouse full of beatniks quoting heavy poetry.

I’m sure when school resumes in August I’ll have more to share, so stay tuned. 🙂

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A Day at the Courthouse

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When I saw this sign, I wondered if I’d been transported to Birmingham, England. It wasn’t until I uploaded the above picture at home that I saw someone else had noticed and penned a correction!

 

We had been warned – it will take 4-5 hours. So, my husband took the day off for us to get our Alabama driver’s licenses and my car tag/title taken care of. He has to go back to get his tag/title taken care of. He will do that alone. We were there for six hours last Tuesday.

We decided to go the courthouse in Bessemer as it seemed the closest place to us. I came armed with a good book to read and my cell phone. In between chapters I kept my friend back home apprised of the situation via texts. She lived in Birmingham about four years ago and was quite familiar with the scenario.

Where shall I begin? We started the process about 8:40am – we were numbers 18 & 19. At 10:15am they were still on number three. There was an older gentleman who got in line, hopefully for an ID and not a driver’s license. He had a cane but was still pretty unstable. But he had no birth certificate; could be it had been written on a stone tablet somewhere. Thankfully, everyone was very kind to him before he left in search of the elusive birth certificate.

A young upstart was walking around with a shirt that read, “I’m allergic to stupid.” I wondered how he was able to get a number. Soon, everyone was inquiring about each other’s numbers. Kind of like the first day of school but without any bells to let us know when it was time to change classes, which we didn’t need anyway as we weren’t going anywhere.

My friend suggested that I could write about the life and times of two Alabama employees. Here is my introduction: “Once upon a time there were two people who were vying for the title of Least Productive Employee of the Month.”

Another young man was quite humorous. His observation of one of the employees: “She went to the bathroom and on break all in one motion”; upon finding out some people had given up and left, “We’re the last of the Mohicans.” My friends responded that at least they are well read in Bessemer.

After I got my license, I headed downstairs for the tag business. I observed a sign behind the woman who was waiting on me that made me wonder at all the Southern Hospitality I’d been experiencing since we moved. The sign said, “Unless you pay into the coffee funds, you are NOT welcome to any of the coffee supplies.” Hmmm. SOMEbody was disgruntled.

We didn’t pack a lunch and I was afraid to chew gum for fear of a loudly growling stomach, so I survived on a few tic-tacs. I was very happy when we finally got lunch/dinner about 3:30. We ate at La Brisa on John Hawkins Parkway, sitting  outside, enjoying our meal and nice cold drink. That will be for another post.